If Walls Could Talk...

I would really want them to speak in British accents.

So, this day has been pretend productive.  While I didn't do the dishes or my homework, I did move my room around for a better atmosphere and I did pick up my clothes off the floor and put them somewhere else...I just don't remember where.

Anyway, I've noticed recently that my walls have been accumulating crap that I just keep putting up on them.  I don't even remember why some of it is up there, but it's there.  I feel that knowing why this stuff is on my wall will give y'all better insight into my life and help me understand my life a little bit more, because I am at a total loss.

So, on one wall, I have me one of them unmotivational posters.  Love that store and my house will have a demotivational room where these posters and coffee mugs will be placed throughout.  Seriously, these posters are awesome.

While that is covering one wall, I've got a series of letters and lists and signs and pictures and other assortments of goodies covering the other wall in my room.  These sorts of things include:

A Care Bear Drawing
Carefully colored (all in the lines too!) by one of my friends.  It says "Always Share".  Apparently, I don't share very well.  Maybe that's because it's my stuff and that hobo didn't need change for a burger, he wanted drugs!

A Portrait of Myself
Drawn carefully in red pen by one of my artistic friends.

The Contract
From when I sold my soul to the devil formed a band with my friends (not really, but you get the idea).  Article 3, my personal favorite, reads "Bitch Please."

Goodbye Letter
From my boss when I quit the nursing home I worked at.  It reads:
"Cheryl (the cook), Today is Brian's last day.  Please have him work in his polo today.  I don't have a uniform for him.  Jeff."
Thanks...really heartfelt message there.

A Stick
From one of my friends.  That stick is the embodiment of our friendship and can't be broken.  EVER!
PS, read her blog there --> http://storieswithemily.blogspot.com/

My Name Tag
From the nursing home I used to work at.

My Horoscope
From the birthday I used to have.

A Wisconsin Cheese Poster
From my roommate's parents (apparently, they think I really like cheese or something.)

Finally, a To Do List:
Pee of the balcony at my apartment.
Pop ball.
Go make me a sandwich, bitch.
Invade Ghana.
Piss all over the place.

Naturally, this list is still a work in progress.

But for real, this stuff all has personal momento value or something like that.  I'm sort of a packrat in that way.  I keep anything that I associate with a memory, probably because I have an irrational fear that I might end up in a coma and not remember anything, and these momentos are going to be the only things that help me remember.

I could delve deeper into that, but I will save that for Irrational Fear Month (February).  Which is a good time to announce that I have successfully planned for my blog for the next two months (February and March).  February is Irrational Fear Month and March will be Awkward Situations Month, where I will share with you all the awkward situations that I have to face in my awkward as heck life!

The Bears,
The Bulls